25 Relationship Red Flags That Prove He Is Not The One: Even If It Feels Like He Is

No one likes getting their parade rained on. We get it and we hate to do this to ya. Being single sucks at times and now that there is finally someone you’re interested in and, more importantly, is interested back, why be a pessimist?

Because you’ve been there before. You meet someone, you fell in love, and started planning your future out, thinking he’s the One, only to face bitter disappointment.

You picked yourself up, became stronger, and this time smarter. This time, you are going to take a step back and let his actions speak louder than his words.

You see, actions and behaviors are like red flags. We all have them. There are red flags that by themselves aren’t that menacing. The no biggie, slightly irritating, but not a deal breaker flags.

And then there are the drop him like a hot potato and run for the hills flags. Regardless of which category your red flags are in, if they start adding up, the “one” clearly isn’t the One.

So go through this checklist and see if maybe your prince charming has one red flag too many.

1. Your Relationship Started While He Was Still With His Ex

Your adults, and yes, he may have realized that he was with the wrong person. But too many movies make this seem like an innocent thing. He is not “the one” if he cheated on his last partner with you.

And no, this is not a sign of how passionate he is about you. It is a red flag that he cannot be honest, faithful, and mature enough to put others feelings first. If he cheated on you, what makes you think he won’t cheat on you? Hmmm?

2. He Refuses to Acknowledge Your Relationship In Public

There are some guys who like to keep their private life, well…private. He may not want to update his Facebook status or tell the whole world and you can respect that. But if he is completely hiding your relationship and keeping it under-wraps it’s a red flag.

3. You Are Putting in All The Effort

A relationship takes 100% effort from both of you and you shouldn’t have to be the one to initiate and invest in the relationship alone.

4. He Doesn’t Respect Your Boundaries

If he cannot respect your boundaries, it is time to part ways. Someone who doesn’t stop touching you, even innocently when you ask them to is a red flag that they don’t respect your personal space and boundaries.

5. He Tries to Monopolize Your Time, Relationships and Asks for Access to Your Phone, Email, and Facebook

Abusive relationships are no joke and they start with isolating you from your friends and family. Any guy who tries to drive a wedge between you and your closest friends and family is showing you a massive red flag.

6. You Don’t Approve of His Money Habits

If you cannot come to an agreement before marriage, beware. Finances are said to be the number one stressor in relationships, so you should take care to make this battlefield as small as possible.

7. He Has a Completely Different Moral Compass Than You

He may be hot, charming, and romantic, but if he has a different moral compass than you, it is sure to cause strife. You may be raising children with this man so be sure to partner with someone who shares your values.

8. You Don’t Like His Friends

“Birds of a feather flock together” the old adage goes and if your man is hanging with the wrong crowd there may be an underlying reason for it. It’s a red flag that you simply can’t ignore.

9. He’s Constantly in a Conflict with Someone

If your man is rude or frequently experiences conflict and tension with other people then you must look for the common denominator.

10. Constantly Throws Out Ultimatums to Get Their Way

There is no need to escalate every argument to a nuclear level. If he’s threatening to break-up with you now, it will be divorce threats later. “Ain’t nobody got time for that!”

Are you clear on the first 10? Cause, there are plenty more! We are positive that once you learn to look for these, you will be able to add your own to this list as well.

But it doesn’t stop there, here are 15 other reasons!

11. He’s talented at making negative comments

12. He hasn’t learned to say, “I’m sorry, please forgive me”

13. He can’t let things go and get historical during a disagreement, citing everything you have ever done wrong.

14. He refuses to be accountable and lays the blame elsewhere

15. He lies about his whereabouts

16. He is cruel or neglectful to his pets or animals

17. Constantly belittles or downplays your accomplishments

18. He has to be right all the time

19. Has violent or dangerous reactions when angry (ex. punching walls)

20. He depends on you to make him happy

21. There’s a double standard going on

22. He disrespects or treats your family, friends, and service people poorly

23. He never discusses the future with you

24. His sense of humor is always sarcastic and biting toward you

25. He thinks you can do no wrong or wants to change you

We don’t know about you, but someone who doesn’t see the real me can’t be “the one”.  A lifetime commitment requires mutual respect and understanding, not a pedestal or makeover project.