When it comes to love, the pursuit of your crush can be exhausting and quite a bit of hard work. It can be downright confusing whether you have your eye on someone at work or a person you’ve known for years.
But how do you turn the tables and make your crush fall in love with you?
These might not work for everyone, but if they’re into you at least one should be enough to spark their interest and get them messaging you, instead of the other way round.
1. Stop Chasing
How do you expect someone to pursue you if you’re already after them? Usually, one person is the chaser at the start of a relationship so give them a chance to go after you by backing off a little. This doesn’t mean cold-shoulder type behavior, just ease up on the attention you give them. This gives them space and time to not only miss you but make them realize how they feel about you too.
And, if they don’t come for you at least you know they’re not interested.
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2. Exude Confidence
We’re naturally drawn to people with confidence, so appearing out-going and self-assured is going to arouse their intrigue and make them want to spend time with you.
Remember faith doesn’t equal volume or arrogance. You can seem just as confident by having a huge smile on your face and being comfortable and friendly with others as being the loudest person in the room.
3. Play Hard to Get
It’s hard not to get excited when someone you like shows interest, but try you may be thankful for it later. Turn down his request for your number, mull over their offer of a date and whatever you do, try to avoid succumbing to their charms. Chances are the more you push them away, the harder they’ll work.
It’s just human nature to want something more, the more we’re denied it so consider you as the prize they get after proving why they should be with you. It’s also a good way to test how much they care because someone who isn’t willing to put in the legwork, isn’t worth your effort.
Just make sure you don’t go too far the other way and end up being plain rude.
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4. Don’t Change Your Life
No seriously. How can you expect someone to be interested if your whole life is focused on them? Take a step back and turn your attention to you. See your friends, take that trip you have been talking about and get through that pile of books that have been building up. You might feel like showing them you’ve interested the best way to reel them in, but in fact, often it’s the complete opposite.
Don’t give up your life because you have met someone new, get them to prove why they should get the chance to be in yours. Not only is it healthier and confident to work on yourself, but you’ll also build the world they will want to be part of. Someone who has their passions and hobbies is not only more exciting and fun; it proves you’re not dependent on a partner to have a life, which makes you even more desirable.
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5. Let Them Meet The Real You
Never hide who you are, especially when it comes to your love life. We might present the best versions of ourselves when around someone we fancy, but changing or lying about your character or life is the completely wrong attitude to take. Not only is it going to lead to problems down the line, but you’re also going to come off as fake and insincere.
If they don’t like the real you now they won’t like them down the line, so they might as well meet them as soon as possible.
6. Don’t Call or Text
This should be an easy one – let them be the one to message and call first. You don’t want them to think you’re watching your phone and waiting for a message so, let calls go to answer the phone and hold for a while before responding. We all have that nervous feeling when you’re waiting for a message back, and then longer it goes on the more they will question whether you’re interested.
When you do answer, keep it short and sweet, limiting your contact will only make them want it more. When it comes to social media posts try to stay calm and don’t overdo the likes – it’s the easiest giveaway that you’re stalking their profiles online, which can come across a little desperate despite the fact we all do it.
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7. Keep Some Mystery
Lying your cards on the table can cut out the games, but it’s also a sure-fire way to stop them chasing you. Pursuing someone you like is driven by intrigue, and the big question “do they like me?.”
If you want to be pursued, maintain an air of mystery and try to give as little away about your feelings as possible. That intrigue will ramp up the sexual tension between you and only make them desire you more.
8. Make Them Crave Your Attention
Whether it’s making them wait a week for a coffee, responding to texts a few hours after or just being unavailable, making someone fight for your attention is only going to make them chase you more. They will begin craving your attention, and the more you make them work for it, the more they’ll want it.
This can seem cruel, but it’s part of human nature that we desire the unattainable. They should feel grateful that you took time out your day to see them, not assume you would always drop everything to see them.
9. Avoid Being Too Nice
You’ve heard of treating them mean, keep them keep? Well, it still works, and it’s important to consider this if you’re trying to get someone to pursue you. Gushing over their new haircut, complimenting their dress sense and being a huge ego boost is not going to get a date, and in fact, it may put them off altogether. Try to be aloof and cold when around them and hold back when it comes to what you like about them.
Chances are quite a bit, so just try and be restrained. Not only is this a sexy and intriguing way to behave, but it’s also perfect for drawing them in. They’ll wonder why you’re not paying them attention and attempt to impress you instead.
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