I see too many people losing themselves to other people, whether it’s because they are trying to fish for approval or acceptance. Don’t let anyone tell you what to do. Even when you are putting your best interests first, don’t let anyone tell you that you are being selfish. You are not being selfish, you are being smart.
There is always something and someone that is going to critique your decisions so you might as well ignore the haters and do what makes you happy. If you start putting yourself first you will see your quality of life change and if anyone has a problem with your self-care, they can swiftly leave, which is a wonderful way to clean the negative people out of your life.
Never let people make you feel bad for something that you want. They clearly don’t have your best interest in mind.If you are reading this and start to realize that you might be caught up in what other people think, then a great tip for you would be asking yourself what you really want. I know it sounds simple but really, ask yourself “what is the best decision?” When someone asks you to do something, before you automatically say yes, just simply ask yourself if you really want to commit to that task.
This can apply to anything and everything. From things within the confines of a dating relationship to your family relationships.
Don’t let your sympathy for others make you go out of your way to help them before you help yourself. This is super common, especially among parents, to put everyone before yourself. I can understand putting your children first but don’t put anyone else before you. You deserve some free time to relax, so stop caring how you will be seen by others and take back your self-confidence and self-worth.
Putting yourself first is very important, especially when dating. If you don’t have your best interests at heart then who will? Don’t let your feelings for a person persuade you into scenarios that you don’t want. You have the power to say “no”. It took me a long time to get comfortable not caring what people think, and doing what’s right for me personally. But I got there and it doesn’t matter how much you like someone, if they only like the person you become trying to please them then they definitely are the wrong person for you.
This doesn’t just include dates, but parents and friends also. Don’t let peer pressure with the hope of being popular weigh down on you. You have enough stress in your everyday life you don’t need to add more worrying about what you look like to other people or what people think of you. The less you care about others opinions the more confidence will emanate from you and ironically, this will create a scenario where more people will like you, though for the right reasons.
Nothing feels better than doing something that you really want to do and getting recognized positively for it when you are not looking for any praise at all.
Parents can lay a lot of pressure on us. Trust me I know, but that doesn’t mean that you are going to ruin their opinion of you for doing what you want in life. Don’t pick a career that you think would make them proud, pick something that makes you happy and proud, and they will follow suit most likely.
You will be miserable if you pick things in honor of other people, especially if you pick a career hoping to impress your parents and they end up not happy with your choice. So if you’re going to do something it might as well be what you want since you can never predict how people react and you are the one who has to live with your choices.
So before you answer a question or a favor request or make a big decision, take a few seconds and really think about what you want. Do you really want to date this person? Do you really want to get an economics degree? It only takes a few seconds and those few seconds could make all the difference.
Please Share With Your Friends and Family!
Note: Peace Quarters is an open platform for contributors to share their thoughts, experiences, and wisdom. If you’d wish to contribute sign up to our expert’s program here!
