So, you are in a relationship with someone, and you really like them, but there is a pinging in the back of your mind that’s always wondering if they are the one, or if there is someone more suited for you out in the world.
The power of imagination is a key factor in one method of telling. If you can see yourself leaving your current companion without being too heartbroken or you can imagine that you would be happier with someone else, then they clearly aren’t “the one.”
There isn’t necessarily “one” person that completes everyone, but there are people that feel like a right fit.
You are not limited to just one.
When you find one of these special people you will want to spend time with them, you are okay with the idea of just sitting around together doing nothing. They are kind and understanding and don’t make you feel bad if something happens, or you make a mistake.
Firstly, if you are a relationship that is not exciting or you want to stay with them because you think you have the best person you can get, but the spark is gone. Leave. Don’t let the concept of “the one” keep you somewhere just because you think you may regret letting them go. If you are not feeling a spark, just let it go. There is always someone else out there.
If you’re happy and you love every minute you spend with the person you are with, then I would stick with them. For me “the one” is someone that will never lose their appeal. They are always interesting, and fun and they make you happy to know them.
Of course, in every relationship, there are bad days and rough patches, but during those times, if you still love your companion, if you would still protect them in a dangerous situation, then that is another reason to stay with them.
Humans always wonder if there is someone better out there, it’s an animalistic quality that wants to make sure we are perfecting our lineage, though it’s mostly subconscious. It’s also something that is really amped up with the concept of marriage. When someone gets married they go into thinking that it’s forever, so they put all of their chips in one basket.
If you like the person, you are with and don’t know if they are “the one” then don’t marry them. There isn’t a law saying you have to get married. Be happy with who you are and if someone else comes along that you like more, then go with them. It’s simple. You don’t pick one person as your best friend and never let them go. If they do something wrong you unfriend them, why do we insist that when picking a date it must be for life?
I’m not saying it shouldn’t be for life, but I’m saying if we remove that perfectionist pressure, that “I’m going to be stuck with this person for fifty more years, but I can’t predict how the future will work” pressure then we can enjoy what we have at the moment.
I have dated various men and all of them a different sort of match, most of them were lovely. I like the experience that comes with dating someone, so as long as you love the journey there is nothing to worry about.
Why do we have to be perfect? Why do we have to find the perfect person? Your perfect person may be the person that is not so perfect. Kindness and happiness do not always come wrapped in a flawless package.
So stop making “the one” be all about perfection. Let it mean that you found someone you love being with, someone you love being with and think you always will love being with.
“The one” means something different to everyone. Determine what it means to you. Just realize that it’s not all black and white, no one is really like that in reality, and it will make your time dating and living a lot more enjoyable.
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